Whether a Husband Identifies as a Breadwinner Depends on Whether He Respects His Wife’s Career — Not on How Much She Earns

A new study suggests that while some men still fall back on the classic identity of a breadwinner, others adopt a modern identity of a “breadsharer.” In-depth interviews with 42 heterosexual male consultants showed that more than half (about 60%) value their wives’ careers. These men, the breadsharers, described their wives’ work in glowing terms, regarding it as high status, worthy of respect, and financially important to their families. For the 40% of the men who identified as traditional breadwinners, it was another story. These men accorded low social status to their wives’ work and minimized their financial contributions — even when their wives earned six-figure salaries, and even when their wives earned most of the family income. In our conversations about work, career, and couples, we often focus on earnings and work hours. This study shows that status plays a vital role as well (notably, no wife who was a doctor or a lawyer found her earnings marginalized, no matter her salary). Salaries are more than dollars and cents; they have a social meaning and that meaning is quite malleable.